About a year ago, I thought I was going mentally insane. I was on the Internet and a loud ping sound kept popping through my computer speakers. No matter what I did, the sound would not go away. The oddest thing about it was that it happened more frequently any time a touchdown was scored in the NFL game I was watching.
I couldn’t prove it to anyone around me, but there had to have been a correlation between the two, right? I finally scrolled down on LuDawgs’ main forum page and was hit with a golden beam of light. Like Christopher Columbus falling on America, I had found LuChat and LuDawgs users screaming “CJ2K!!!!” He had just scored and everyone in unison was chanting his name (ok, we all know that guy never scores, but you get the point).
That loud ping noise was the chat room that elevated my fantasy talents to another level. LuChat might be a normal looking chat box, but what isn’t normal is the amount of information thrown around (insert Bobby Brown joke here).
While the LuDawgs’ forum has threads upon threads upon threads of fantasy action, the chat is where the real degenerates lay around. From the time the chat is open at the bottom of the page (usually 6pm-6am eastern), LD users stroll in and discuss what’s on their mind and get everyone’s opinions. It’s a quick and easy way to discuss players, which is key at a time like Sunday afternoon at 12:30.
The most popular time of the chat is when the action is happening. Don’t get me wrong, I love talking fantasy sports and who I do/don’t like, but there’s something fun about rooting on Chad Henne with ten other grown men. I know I’m a little biased here, but to me there’s nothing else like it on the Internet.
To raise awareness for LuChat I’ve decided to give you guys and gals the “in’s and out’s” of it all. Think of what I’m about to tell you as “Unwritten rules.” I think writing them out though kind of defeats the purpose, but oh well.
- Ask questions about players you’re considering in fantasy sports for the relevant time. 99% of people in the chat will help when asked.
- Voice your opinion when others ask for help. If you have good reasons behind what you say then respect will be given.
- Watch the games and let others know how games are going. Not all of us stream our sports or have the NFL package, so keep us updated on games and we’ll do the same.
- Sit in LuChat expecting to have all your questions answered without any reciprocation. Nobody likes being used.
- Spout false information. You’ve never seen how people react when realizing their running back didn’t really score. It’s NSFW.
- Brag about a play of yours nonstop. It’s great if you called a sleeper to come out and be great, but keep it limited. If the player was a ridiculous choice then you must bring pictures for proof.
Now that you know the basic do’s and don’ts of LuChat it’s time to learn some of the lingo that gets tossed around.
Double dipping– Verb: Scoring two touchdowns at one time. When a QB/WR or QB/TE combo of yours scores it is considered to be double dipping.
Late game sweat– Noun. The pressure and excitement of having the last game of the night in fantasy action.
Stroke it– Verb. A nice and usually joking way of saying “GTFO.” When someone comes in chat and starts bragging about a particular play of theirs, the right thing to do is to tell them to stroke it.
Werd/Swerve – Verb. “Cool” ways of saying that you agree. If someone asks to pick between two players and he says he’s leaning towards one of them then all you have to say is “swerve.”
The NBA season is finally here, and because of that you can’t just walk into chat and be throwing around proper names. LuChat works solely on a nickname basis and it’s critical to know these names. Most of the players are known by either their first name when obvious (Kobe Bryant) or just by their last name.
- “Toad” – Russell Westbrook
- “DMC” – DeMarcus Cousins
- “Fat Al/Big Al/dogface” – Al Jefferson
- “Jimbut” – Jimmy Butler
- “Caldy” – Jose Calderon
- “Manimal” – Kenneth Faried
- “Smoove” – Josh Smith
- “Iggy” – Andre Iguodala
- “Domo” – Donatas Motiejunas
- “PG”- Paul George
- “Z-Bo” – Zach Randolph
- “Uni/brow” – Anthony Davis
- “Melo” – Carmelo Anthony
- “Vuci” – Nikola Vucevic
- “LMA” – LaMarcus Aldridge
- “Dwill” – Deron Williams
- “Dwill2” – Derrick Williams
When any player makes a 2 or 3 feel free to insert it into their name. For example, Jameer becomes “Jam33r” or Kobe becomes “Kob3.” It’s a simple idea, but one that makes for an even better time when Jameer Nelson is hot and suddenly is known as Jam333333333333r.
Well, at this time I can no longer help you. You have all you need to feel comfortable on LuChat, so go give it a shot tonight! There is always an event going on to make it a fun place to be.
Welcome to the lunatic fringe.